Who am I?

(part 2)

What do I feel about myself?

A very unanswerable question for me. Well, of course I can answer it. But not the real answer that I want to say. Instead, I'll just be saying that I'm totally fine. Gosh.

I just hate answering this!

But if I'm going to answer this question, then I'll answer it this way. :)

"I don't like to shed my tears especially in front of my friends and family"

Basically, I'm not that emotional. I don't show my feelings or express my feelings directly. What I mean is that, whenever there are emotional situations, I keep my heart tight and hard. As much as possible, I don't like to shed my tears especially in front of my friends and family. I like crying alone in my room with a pillow as a shock absorber.

In terms of life, I am more matured compared to my peers. Maybe one of the reason for being like this is experience. I think I have more experience than them in terms of problems and survivals that's why I think maturely. Also, since I was a kid, I know what life is. I know the odds and evens, the ups and downs and how to cope up with it. (I'm really a feeler!)

I can't say that I'm contented in life nor can I say that I hate life. Well, maybe moderately contented but as much as possible I do my best to fulfill my dreams and goals in life. I don't care if my classmates and friends have new laptops and other gadgets. All I care is that as long as I'm fine and contented with what I have and as long as I have no major problem, I'll be fine.

(to be continued)

Who am I?

(part 1)

This was an activity we've done in school in which our teacher gave us questions to guide us in what to write about our self.

What I wrote about myself were purely shallow. I mean, I was not in my mood at that time and I really don't know what to write. That's why I wrote the shallowest information I can think of.

And after a week, which was yesterday, our teacher told us that she'll let us read what we have wrote one by one. Some of my classmates were shocked maybe because they wrote personal informations. And as for me, not guilty. Haha.

"I even envy my classmate because they can express themselves easily in which I can't."

The mood in the classroom was melancholic. All girls and Jash cried, except me and Janiz. Whoah! Hearing all the things they wrote makes my heart melt. But I just can't figure out why tears won't come out of my eyes. Maybe because I'm strong. (Am I? Or just pretending to be?) I don't know. But each time a classmate of mine finish reading, I always ask myself why I can't write such nice composition. I even envy my classmate because they can express themselves easily in which I can't. How sad. Maybe because I am more inclined in intra personal reflection. Also, I don't like writing my thoughts except in my diary. (Excluding this blog!)